In the wake of the Great WP-Tonic Implosion (GWPTI) of 2022, I want to do something different. There’s been a lot of talk about racism recently, and the GWPTI was really just the nail in the coffin for a lot of BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and people of color) people in the WordPress community. So today, we’re going to review, get a little bit indignant, and hopefully a bit more humble. Let’s talk about racism.
Just so it’s out there — I’m speaking to you as a white person. And the last thing I’m trying to do is speak for the BIPOC community or be a white savior or some sort of authority on anti-racism. The point of this post is to simply encourage humility in other white folks as we barely tap the tip of the racism iceberg.
What the hell was the WP-Tonic thing?
So, on Friday, September 23, 2022, WP-Tonic put up an episode of their podcast (which has since been taken down, surprise surprise). In it, a panel of pasty white people discussed a recent decision Twilio made regarding anti-racist layoffs.
“As you all know, we are committed to becoming an Anti-Racist/Anti-Oppression company,” Lawson wrote. “Layoffs like this can have a more pronounced impact on marginalized communities, so we were particularly focused on ensuring our layoffs – while a business necessity today – were carried out through an Anti-Racist/Anti-Oppression lens.”
Jeff Lawson, Twilio CEO — NY Post, Adam Sabes
The lily-white panel goes into complaining about how it wasn’t fair, and even calling it “woke shit.” And that’s the hill they died on last week.
Well, for some reason, making an effort to make marginalized people a little less marginalized is super offensive to some people. And being offended by this is no different than some yokel screaming “them thar Mexicans is stealin’ our jobs!” It’s ignorant and possessive. Some white people are scared of just as many BIPOC individuals in the workforce is just – sad. And honestly, scary. People do scary, irrational shit when they start to lose power. And that’s exactly what it’s about at the end of the day – power.
Nyesha Green of Master WP has in-depth thoughts and recounts regarding the event:
The issue here is also reverse racism. Regardless of the fact that “racism” is a term for hate or discrimination based on race (any race), typically reverse racism is in the context of another race being racist towards white people specifically.
Reverse racism can exist on a very individual and specific level (such as a BIPOC person jumping a white stranger only because they’re white). However, on a grand scale, no — at this moment, no, reverse racism isn’t a relevant argument. The issue of racism is taking something away from a person due to race. And on a grand scale, the BIPOC community is primarily marginalized while white people dominate areas of human interest – food, employment, medical care, and so on. The people in power (aka, white people) have the ability to hamstring an already marginalized group of people and they often do! This is racism. However, when the marginalized group of people without the power to take something away criticizes the white people, this isn’t racism. This is like… complaining about your asshole boss for being an asshole.
When it comes to affirmative action or anti-racist layoffs, what some people hear is “people are going to have a job just because they’re a person of color.” This mindset, in and of itself, is racist. These people could not possibly imagine that a person of color could be a qualified candidate and their ONLY merits are being born BIPOC. When they hear Twilio talking about keeping marginalized people safe, their first thought isn’t “I see, so if there are two equally qualified candidates but one is black and one is white, they will probably let the white person go as an effort to create a more equitable workforce.” They think, “So lazy-ass Carlos and DaMar with GEDs get to keep their jobs but Chad from Princeton is now unemployed – this is racist!” Maybe not that exact sentence, but that is, in my opinion, the general thought process of people who get angry about anything that implies giving the BIPOC community a leg up in the workforce.
It falls under a subconscious assumption that all BIPOC people are not as worthy/educated/qualified/experienced as their white counterparts. So they can’t rationalize that the competition would be equal. While I don’t want to speak for the BIPOC community, I have heard many members complain about diversity hires, also. Because they feel their worth beyond their skin color isn’t being seen. And they are worthy! The unfortunate fact is the people in charge are still old enough to have seen Gone with the Wind in theatres on opening night and are uncomfortable around people of color. As a result, a white person is more likely to get a job over a more qualified POC. So guess what? It doesn’t seem like anyone likes the idea of race-based hiring and firing, but at this moment it’s the only thing keeping old white CEOs from having a board room that looks like an egg carton. Unfortunately, there are still a lot of white people who can’t consider this because from their point of view, BIPOC people are just getting a free lunch.
You don’t have to go far to see racism around you
It doesn’t matter if you only follow progressive people on social media, surround yourself with like-minded individuals, or “have a black friend.” You really don’t have to go far to witness racism all around us every day. Let’s look at a very popular topic: Black Ariel.
For some reason, people are losing their minds over a children’s movie. This is because… they can no longer “relate” to the character. It says a lot about the people commenting on these handful of characters who were previously white and are now… not white. White people got used to seeing themselves everywhere, which had the counter effect of the BIPOC people NOT seeing themselves ANYWHERE. So now that some of those white characters are being replaced with BIPOC characters, white people are seeing their “reign” gradually reduced. Even though media is still very much dominated by white people, it’s like taking away a single coin from Scrooge McDuck. Power cultivates obsession and greed and when that is translated to social issues, some people see that as offensive or thievery of their power.
Characters are re-imagined all the time in this era of no new movies, just re-making old ones. And a lot of the characters being re-imagined come from an era of segregation. It doesn’t matter how progressive the original authors were – the facts of the times were, if you didn’t have a white main character nothing would sell. Most Disney movies are based on stories written in the 1800s with MUCH darker storylines, so if we’re going to repeatedly re-imagine them anyway, why not be diverse to reflect a more realistic modern time? Superheroes are also a popular re-make pool, and most of these are based on comics that were birthed in the 60s. So, again, I ask: why can’t we reflect a more modern time and make them inclusive? We should be better than we used to be and a BIPOC main character shouldn’t be as shocking as it still seems to be.
It’s an extremely illogical argument to have with anyone who opposes such inclusion. It’s incredibly predictable, also. It will eventually swing around to “It’s unrealistic because… the sun doesn’t reach the bottom of the ocean so Ariel couldn’t be black” or “…the sun doesn’t reach underground so Dwarves can’t be black.” Like, bitch, with that logic Ariel would be a translucent angler monster and Dwarves would be blind like moles. You can’t apply logic to racism because it is completely illogical. They are thoughts by greedy people who don’t like people that don’t look like them – it’s as simple as that. They are fuelled by the illogical thought of “I can’t give away a slice of my pie because then I’ll have less pie. And I really need to eat this whole pie myself.”
I’ve been racist
The goal of this post was to say some shit out loud that makes me uncomfortable. If I’m being honest, I’m hoping it inspires the five people who might read this to be more humble and honest with themselves.
Throughout my life, I’ve never been proactive enough to combat racism. I’ve been content thinking I wasn’t a racist so as far as I was concerned, I wasn’t the problem. But I was, and still am. And when I was younger, I was one of those people who was offended by being grouped in with the racist. It took many years and a lot of listening to recognize where I needed to do better and how my mindset wasn’t conducive to an equal world. I’m not trying to toot my own horn here, but I can not emphasize enough how important shutting up and listening with an open mind is.
I have black friends
I’ve fallen into this trap before: “I have BIPOC friends.” My sister is Asian and my best friends are black (“V”) and Mexican (“B”). So growing up, I was often surrounded by more BIPOC people than white people. “Look at how inclusive I am!” For a long time, I thought that’s all there was do it. I, on an individual level, was doing my part. You know what that translates to? “I am white and want to be your friend, you should feel honored!” And how awful is that? Whether they (or I) recognize it or not, throwing the “I have black friends” card out there is essentially saying you, the humble king, has walked among the peasants and exhibited kindness and chosen a select few to bring back to the castle. It is completely eye-roll-worthy and indicative of someone who has been unwilling to look inward and view their actions objectively.
Relying on this also creates a blindness to the bigger picture by depending on independent opinion and applying it to the entire community. For example, I will never forget the rant “V” went on when we were teens about the term “African American” – which she vocally despised back then. She said, verbatim, “Bitch, my family is from the UK and I’ve never been to Africa – I AM BLACK.” I ended up applying this rant to my way of thinking when referring to people of color without considering the individual needs and differences of people. I applied this single thought as a blanket statement to the entire community, and that’s ignorant and disrespectful. I was never faced with this, but how would I have responded if someone asked me to use “African American” instead of “black?” Would I be like “Oh, well, my black friend told me to use black so that’s what I’m gunna do because a black person told me to do it so I’m OK!” God, I’d like to think I’d have been more open-minded, but honestly… I can’t be sure.
Your BIPOC friend is not an ambassador for you and you shouldn’t put the burden on them to teach you how to be less racist. That’s on you, and on all of us, to listen and learn and accept there are things we do that we may not even be aware of that are disrespectful to the BIPOC community.
The cops blamed them even though it was my fault
About a decade ago, I got really sick with the flu. I had a 103 F/40 C fever and hadn’t slept in two days. It was past midnight and I was desperate for a reprieve. In the days before InstaCart, my idiotic, delirious self thought it would be a good idea to drive down the street and get some NyQuil to drown myself in. The store was only about a quarter mile down the road, but I ended up falling asleep behind the wheel and rear-ending a young Mexican-American couple.
The couple was really nice about it and were extremely compassionate (I remember the girlfriend even digging in her purse to see if she had any Tylenol on her to offer me). I kept my distance from them because I didn’t know how contagious I was. Everyone was insured and it seemed like it was going to work out just fine… until the cops showed up. Immediately, the cops thought the couple was at fault before they asked any questions. They noted I was standing far away from them and one of the cops laid a comforting hand on me and whispered “Are you OK?” Though a lot of this memory is hazy due to my illness at the time, I remember the shifty look in this cop’s eyes as he nodded over to the couple and realizing he was asking if I was OK, as if the couple assaulted me. And the only possible reason for this would have been their race. Especially because the cop that was talking to the couple was not asking if they were OK, but asking them if they had been drinking that night.
Everything was worked out in the end. But I look back at that and get angry at myself. It actually took me years to put the pieces together and realize all the race-based issues that night. I was tired and exhausted and sick and got behind the wheel anyway. That was SO dangerous. No one was hurt, but they could have been. I rear-ended that couple. So why did the cops immediately assume the Mexican couple was at fault before even interviewing people? Because they violated a major traffic rule: driving while brown. In this minor incident, no one was hurt and it was just a couple of dents in our bumpers, but this kind of shit is happening ALL THE TIME in much more serious and dire scenarios. A lot of white people don’t realize this because, in their opinion, they dodged a bullet. They don’t recognize that the POC has been taking those bullets their entire life because of their skin tone – something a lot of white people don’t recognize because they’ve only benefitted (so why fix what ain’t broken?). Despite insisting the incident was my fault, the cops were still trying to pin it on the couple by asking me if I suspected they’d brake-checked me. I wish I was brave and mature enough at the time to do more in that moment; at the very least, report those asshole cops for being racist pieces of shit. I don’t want to benefit like that.
This example is the yin to the diversity hire yang. A white person isn’t going to complain about blatant racism exhibited by cops (or anyone in authority) if they benefit; however, in the case of diversity hiring and firing, they will be the first to complain because they don’t benefit. You can see the trend here, right?
“I don’t see color”
I believe there is such a thing as trying too hard, which then creates a problem all on its own. I grew up among a primarily Mexican population and oh my God, it was amazing. Vibrant and spectacular and filled with joy and color. And as a little white kid, nothing made me feel more loved or welcomed than going to a friend’s house where their parents called me “mija.” If you become a person who “can’t see color/race,” you miss out on learning, embracing, and experiencing the wonders of cultures other than your own. And talking about those differences is how we get to know each other – they shouldn’t be shied away from. We are not all the same, and we shouldn’t be. Everyone comes from a different walk of life, regardless of race. In my opinion, the mindset shouldn’t be “I don’t see color,” it should be “I see your color and I think it’s beautiful.”
I’ve also noticed an unnecessary fear amongst white people. It’s not the same fear of saying something offensive that often comes up in the discussions of being politically correct. Another story: I remember visiting my cousin when we were both 20 or so. He and I went to the store because he needed something for his hair. We go to the aisle and he gets the stuff he wanted and says to me, “This is the stuff I use. It’s great, but it’s made for…” he leaned into me and in a hushed voice said, “you know… black people.” I was baffled in this moment. From what I could gather, my blond-haired, blue-eyed cousin wasn’t saying it like it was a bad thing but more like a kid with a hand caught in the cookie jar. Like he had to whisper as if the other shoppers weren’t aware of the difference in white and black hair and by saying it out loud he was somehow divulging confidential information. I just said, “Dude, you are the whitest person in here. We are in the aisle marked ‘African American hair products.’ There is a black guy on the box… I think they know.”
As a perpetual people watcher, I noticed more actions like this as I grew up. White people who were uncomfortable around the BIPOC community and exhibited this behavior like… Slowing down on the highway when you pass a cop so you don’t get a speeding ticket. Even if you weren’t going fast enough to qualify for a speeding ticket, people still slow down like it’s instinctual. And that same drastic shift is evident in a lot of white people when they find themselves in the presence of a member (or members) of the BIPOC community. I don’t have a rational explanation for it, honestly. But it’s another example of how white people segregate BIPOC people, even unintentionally, by just treating them differently. Even if the different behavior is positive, like being overly polite to show how OK you are with talking to a person of color, you are still treating someone differently.
How do we do better?
The first step is recognizing there is an issue. Stop being offended and start looking inward. There IS a racism problem out there, and just because you don’t think you’ve benefited from it doesn’t mean you haven’t. The goal is the want to do better.
No one wants to think they’re racist, and most people like to think they’re good people. So when they’re faced with their own flaws, people get defensive. Have you ever accidentally said something that hurt a friend’s feelings but couldn’t understand why it would have been offensive so you dug your heels in the ground and comprised with something dismissive like “I’m sorry your feelings got hurt” because you were so confident what you said wasn’t offensive you had to reason to be apologetic? Maybe people in your life tried to make you see why what you said could have been offensive and insist you should apologize (for real). Maybe others took your side and said that person was being a baby. And ultimately, this argument was probably over something stupid like… a passive comment about someone else’s parenting, an outfit, or even just some friendly teasing that went too far. The fact is, being unwilling to even consider you’re in the wrong or could have said something offensive is reflective of an unwillingness to grow. It’s ignorance of self and an inability to empathize with how your words affect people.
I’m a foul-mouthed person who teases my friends to show affection. But the last thing I want to do is actually hurt them, so I know there are places I shouldn’t go and I know there are lines I shouldn’t cross. And when my friends tell me I’ve gone too far, and I have, I have to accept that no amount of “but you know I was just kidding!” will make up for the fact that I, for even an instant, made them feel bad. I’m also not the most politically correct person in the world, but I know the difference between what is acceptable (like answering “herro” when my Japanese sister calls me because this is a joke she instigated) and what is not acceptable (like assuming all my other Asian friends would be OK with this just because my sister is).
These are all parallels to the grand scheme of things. People get defensive because from their point of view they haven’t hurt anyone and it’s something they’re unwilling to consider because, from their point of view, they’re a good person who doesn’t hurt people. The perspective of being a good person probably shoots white people in the foot more than anything. “I believe the world should be more equal and therefore I am not racist.” This creates an infallible mindset that prevents this person from looking inward because they are already so convinced they aren’t racist. And this can be just as detrimental as a stereotypical Southerner who outright says racist shit at family dinners. Once you think you’re done growing, you’re not going to allow yourself anymore room to grow.
We all need to do better. No one is perfect, and no one is demanding perfection. All that is being requested really is progress. So we have to listen and really consider what the BIPOC community is trying to tell us. Being open to your own growth as a person and starting to take those steps isn’t as hard as it’s made out to be by a lot of these emotionally sensitive, easily offended white people who use “woke” as a slur and act like the BIPOC community is being unreasonable. This is for the benefit of the human race as a whole, which I think people often forget when they become too focused on “them or us.”
It really starts with listening and recognizing where you may unintentionally be taking advantage of privilege at the cost of a marginalized group and having a true willingness to be aware of and learn from past mistakes. In my opinion, it’s less of a priority for white people to try to be the hero of the BIPOC community, and more important for white people as a whole to just stop getting in their way.